not_that_spike: (remembering on mars)
[personal profile] not_that_spike
More than anything, he thinks it would be nice as hell to sleep in, wake up lazily with Beth in his arms, stay in bed all day. Those two and a half years they had... well, shit, he appreciated every damn day of it, but he appreciates them even more now. He's never felt particularly tied to any one place -- never felt anywhere call him going home, home, this is where you belong, Spike Spiegel -- but shit, the bar's the closest thing he's ever had to that.

But then he rethinks that whole more than anything bullshit. What he really wants, more than anything in the whole fucking universe, is to be with Beth.

He's got his wish, even if it's a little bit skewed, and he thinks of that old saying that goes be careful what you wish for, you might get it. This is one time he doesn't mind things going the way they have, even if it would be easier some other way: when he thinks about how long it's been since the way back to the bar got mowed down by an Israeli Merkava battle tank, he's nothing but grateful for being here no matter how difficult the circumstances might make it. He's not sure what he'd be doing now if he was stuck at the bar or the House and there was no sign of Beth or Junior or Hero.

So yeah, even though this is probably the least ideal situation he can practically imagine, he'll take it. He'll take it all the way, because he's with the woman he loves.

And the daughter he loves.

How 'bout that: he's... really not that type of guy. Funny how things can change.

When Ciba and Vlad and Natalya and Hero are all out of earshot and way the hell out of sight on a little hike to find fresh water, he reaches over and tucks Beth's hair back behind her ear. "It's just me, Slim. Your very own invisible bounty hunter."

In Beth's arms, Junior's eyes widen at the sound of his voice and she lets out a big laugh.

"Hope you don't mind me tagging along another few days. I've never been to New York." Even if she can't see it, he's smiling. Yeah, this trip has been tough as hell, but he hasn't lost his sense of humor. It might be his most precious commodity, right after the cloak and the guns and ammo and cigarettes. He lets the cloak fall back and runs a hand through his hair.

He'd do anything for his Beths.

Date: 2007-05-16 01:46 am (UTC)
stbethadettes: (you're muttering in Russian again Nat)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
It's still kind of unnerving when he touches her or talks to her before he opens the cloak to show himself, but Beth smiles in spite of the momentary surprise.

Beth Junior, with a big open-mouthed baby grin on her face, stares at Spike when the cloak falls open and doesn't take her eyes off him. It's a good thing she's not old enough to talk because who knows what the hell she'd be saying about the amazing disappearing, reappearing bounty hunter... but as it is, Spike's giving her an effective ongoing game of peekaboo.

For just a second, Beth hides her smile against the top of Junior's head, pressing a kiss against her hair, and then quickly glances around for signs of the girls before leaning into Spike. "So once we get to New York you're going to ditch us and go see the sights?"

She knows better.

"Have you ever been to France?"

She doesn't know for certain, but she doesn't think so. He's never mentioned it.

Date: 2007-05-16 02:50 am (UTC)
stbethadettes: (and she's... she's pretty huh?)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
With a babble that's nothing but gleeful, Junior bunches her hand in the collar of Beth's shirt, still watching Spike like a tiny plump-cheeked hawk.

"No kidding?" Her smile hints at indulgence, but the look in her eyes is all appreciation. "I love you, too."

It would seem the baby's pretty damn fond of him, too.

She doesn't think they've seen eye to eye on how tight-lipped she's stayed about him with the others, or at least with Hero. But he's not telling her what to do, and she's glad about that.

They're probably spending even more time together than ever before, even considering that they've been shacking up for years, and yet she misses him.

It's stupid, she knows, but they have to steal moments. He gets to see her all the time, and she gets to see him... sometimes. Things can be so unpredictable that they can't even always arrange to sneak around and get some time together.

And it must be a real pain in the ass to have to wear that cloak all the time.

He does it for her, but she wishes he didn't have to.

"How're you holding up?"

Date: 2007-05-16 04:38 am (UTC)
stbethadettes: (the jezebel who stole Yorick for a night)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
Watching them, she leans against a tree and shakes out her arms. Junior can get heavy when she's been holding her for a while.

After the shake of her arms, she folds them over her chest, letting her smile turn a little bit rueful. "I'm sorry."

She hates apologizing for something she's felt is for the best under the circumstances they've found themselves in, but... she is sorry.

"I'm sorry this is so hard."

And it's not all her fault, of course; she knows better than to think that way. But some of it is.

Moving closer, one of her arms curling around his waist and the opposite hand cupping around one of Junior's, she looks up at the sky and goes on before he can say anything in response. "It looks like rain."

Date: 2007-05-16 06:04 am (UTC)
stbethadettes: (any port in a storm)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
Smiling again, she tilts her head, barely blinking when Junior makes a grab for some of her hair.

"You're still sweet."

She just wishes he always had a choice about whether or not he wanted to be in the rain with her. That he loves her isn't in doubt, and it hasn't been in a long time. If she did have any doubts when he came out there, they would've been put to rest time and time again.

You wouldn't do what he's doing for someone you don't love.

You wouldn't do what she's doing for someone you don't love.

"Just promise me one thing, Spike." She can almost still feel his mouth against hers, and a raindrop falls on her shoulder, leaving a small dark spot on the blue of her shirt. "Promise me you'll tell me when it's too much."

Date: 2007-05-16 07:19 am (UTC)
stbethadettes: (let she who has not sinned)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
She's glad when he promises, and what he says about probably not stopping the I love yous almost makes her laugh.

Every guy who's ever told her he loves her is dead. Spike can tell her that as much as he wants, even if it makes her give him indulgent smiles and think he's the biggest closet romantic she knows.

She won't mind.

"Yeah." Despite her answer, she glances around one more time. Junior's hand makes its way from Beth's hair to her face, tiny fingers spreading against her mouth, and she plants a big kiss on it. "We've got a little."

Date: 2007-05-17 06:16 pm (UTC)
stbethadettes: (looking down)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
Beth would be such a goddamn liar if she said the sight of Spike, half-dressed, with rain water streaming down him wasn't attractive as hell, but she and Junior watch him with fairly equal solemnity until a single bold raindrop cuts through the canopy of leaves they're standing under and spatters on the baby's face, near her nose.

Almost immediately Junior scrunches up her face, and when tears look imminent, Beth gently bounces her on her hip, making a low shushing noise.

"Hey, you're all right. See?" She carefully wipes the rain from Junior's face, puts a light kiss in its place, and moves to sit on a tree stump so she can open the diaper bag and rummage around in it for the Junior's little pink hat.

At least it keeps her from dumbly watching Spike as he washes off in the rain, and besides, if any of the girls are in earshot they're probably more likely to come back this way if they hear the baby crying, just to be sure everything's okay. The more time she can buy Spike out of the cloak, the better.

The hat proves to be a decent distraction, and once it's on, Junior reaches up with one hand as if to be sure it's not going anywhere, big blue eyes gazing at Beth.

Now she steals a glance at Spike. "Need something to dry off with?"

Date: 2007-05-17 10:00 pm (UTC)
stbethadettes: (let she who has not sinned)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
Her eyes keep wanting to linger on his open shirtfront, but his question easily coaxes a smile onto her face.


When she was pregnant -- and maybe it was mostly those nutty pregnant chick hormones, but she can't blame it all on them -- she kind of reveled in the near normalcy of curling up with Spike on a couch by the fire in the bar.

Even if rats served their drinks.

Once they moved into the House of Arch, she marveled at how easy she found it to get used to life there. It was almost too good to be true.

There's no point in hoping their rooms are still there for them when they get back, because who knows if they'll ever get back? Once upon a time, she'd have said some door along the way would have to lead back to the bar because Spike just doesn't belong here.

It hasn't happened so far.

Spike wearing the tie is... unimportant and unnecessary, but she'll take it. It'll make her feel good.

"You should."

Date: 2007-05-17 10:58 pm (UTC)
stbethadettes: (you deserve a kiss)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
She's just taken the ends of his tie in her hands when Junior says what sounds a lot like dada, and that's...

Well, fucking amazing is what it is, and she pauses to look at the baby for a second.

But it's probably just a coincidence. Junior can babble with the best of them when she feels like it, and the only person who regularly referred to Spike specifically as daddy when talking to Junior is Hero. And to say Hero hasn't exactly had the chance to do that hell of a lot lately is an understatement.

She doesn't voice any of that to Spike, though. Not when he's got that pleased grin on his face. With a small smile of her own, she busies herself with the serious business of helping him with his tie, and once she's done, she gives it a satisfied pat and plants a kiss right on his lips.

"You're all set, bounty hunter."

Date: 2007-05-18 03:43 am (UTC)
stbethadettes: (Default)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
Beth rests her chin on his shoulder, her fingers playing with his wet hair. Her eyes close after a minute or two, and she lets out a near silent sigh.

If they stay like this much longer, she could probably drift off to sleep right here and now. Even with the occasional babble from Junior to break the relative silence here under the trees now that the rain's mostly stopped.

Her fingertip traces his collarbone through the fabric of his shirt, and she makes her eyes open again.

Next time she gets a chance to take a real shower in a private and lockable bathroom, she's going to urge him to sneak in with her. That's all there is to it.

"On the bright side," she tells him as if they were already in the middle of a conversation, "you haven't gotten to see any amazons yet."

Date: 2007-05-18 05:28 am (UTC)
stbethadettes: (let she who has not sinned)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
That makes her mouth curve into another smile, but it doesn't stop her from saying what she was going to say.

"You don't need to worry about me or Junior. You're the walking target if something ever happens to that cloak. Vlad's a miniature target, too, if anyone's paying close enough attention."

She glances down at Junior, then meets Spike's eyes again, smiling wider. "Even if amazons are scarce these days, I don't really want to have share you anyway."

No doctors, no scientists, no lies upon lies to tell so people don't find out about the bar, especially now that she can't prove it exists.

She can lie just fine, but she'd rather keep the lies at a minimum. With that in mind, she also realizes she could tell Hero about Spike and then only be lying to Hero about what the letter Yorick sent her with said.

There's just been this one niggling thing at the back of her mind. Yorick said in the note that Hero might seem a little off but that he thought all she needed was a friend. They were kind of... thrust together by circumstances before she could really get to know Hero and she did make the decision to leave St. Bernadette's fully aware that Hero had been an amazon, but in the time they've spent together since then, she hasn't seen anything all that off about her.

Hero told her some of the things that she's done, and it was impossible to walk away from that conversation without thinking that Hero had been vulnerable and taken advantage of and basically brainwashed. But still, nothing until that one mutter directed to Victoria on the day they left the hot suite struck her as worrisome. And maybe that was nothing, too. Hell, she talked to Junior out loud all the time when she was alone in the church for that month away from the bar, and the unborn baby sure wasn't going to be holding a real conversation with her. There were times alone in the quiet of the church when she needed to say something aloud just to break the silence.

The real reason for concern is Spike, and there probably shouldn't be any. If Hero's wrestling with some buried issues left over from the time she spent as an amazon, she's hiding it pretty well. And she seems fine with Vlad.

She feels a little guilty doubting Hero the slightest bit, and really, she has tons of respect for her. As far as she's concerned, Hero's the closest friend she's had -- except for Spike -- in years, and she considers her to be in a class of her fucking own.

Eventually, when the opportune time presents itself, she'll have to tell Hero about Spike. Maybe they'll have a chance once they get to the New York harbor.

And if Hero's kind of upset with her for keeping a secret like this, she'll understand. But she won't feel bad about the decision she made to keep it to herself initially.

Date: 2007-05-20 06:54 am (UTC)
stbethadettes: (and she's... she's pretty huh?)
From: [personal profile] stbethadettes
This has already been a little longer than they usually manage to get alone, and she's about to reluctantly say they should probably get ready for the girls showing up again when she hears the crack of wood -- maybe a small branch snapping in two -- not too far away.

It could just be an animal, but she automatically straightens and reaches for Junior, who holds out her own little arms and gets passed over easily enough.

If it was just an animal or something, she'd rather feel silly later than assume nobody was close and have Spike in plain sight for anybody to see.

Before he can gather the cloak around him, she leans in for a kiss that's far too quick.

"Love you."

It's just a whisper, and she gives him a crooked smile. Sometimes it feels kind of like a goodbye when he needs to put the cloak back on again, even though he's not really going anywhere.

She looks forward to regaining some of that sense of normalcy in their relationship, to say the least, but it's definitely not just for her own sake.

He made her a promise, and while he's already demonstrated a knack for keeping promises against the odds, this might just be the first she's asked him for and counts on him to keep.


not_that_spike: (Default)

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