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Jun. 20th, 2006 10:27 pmYeah, it's the middle of the night and she's sleeping so damn soundly, but he can't sleep. Maybe it's worry over the food suddenly tasting like shit or maybe it's because Beth's 26 weeks pregnant or maybe, just maybe, it's because he wants to hold her so bad he can't stop his hand from running up and down her arm, over her hip, onto her waist. Maybe it's not fair but things are a little overwhelming right now: this is it, where they're going to live, where they're going to stay. It's almost like a fucking dream come true even though the place has pros and cons. It's safer than a lot of places (although Snow didn't seem to think it was anywhere near as safe as he does) and it's comfortable (if they could have just brought that bed from New France; if only this room was a little bigger, it'd be perfect for three) and there's food (maybe he'll have to try ordering from the wait-rats instead, see if their food's any better: do they taste-test? it'd figure if they did) and it has a lake (is that damn shark still in it? whatever happened to the squid? how come they don't have a special shallow part of the lake just for little guys?) and a really nice green area (demon fucking bunnies in the woods? hell if I'm letting Junior anywhere near that place).
But it's... just an asteroid. It's small. It feels smaller than the damn Bebop half the time. Still, though, it's where Beth is and fuck if he's going anywhere that puts her in danger.
Sleep. He can't remember more than a time or two out there when he couldn't sleep, but he's had his share of sleepless times here. Mostly from nightmares but not this time. This has nothing to do with dreams, just with being awake.
His hand slides from her waist -- what used to pass for her waist -- to her belly. Junior. You listening in there? Tell me something: you going to love me like a father? I guess you're stuck with me either way but damn, kid, I love the hell out of your mom. She's beautiful and fearless and smart and I wish to hell it was my fault you're on your way to being here, but we can only play the cards we're dealt and that reminds me, don't ever fucking play cards with Faye. She cheats.
No, really. Listen to me, Junior. It's just a quirk of biology that you don't carry my genes but don't let that fool you: there's only one person in the whole damn universe who means more to me than you do and that's your mom, and once you're born I'm not going to make choices on who I love best. There's going to be three of us and it's all equal. It's not a contest. I love Beth and I'll love you. I already do. No one gets to take that away from the bounty hunter. No matter what, no one gets to take it away from me.
Fuck.
Swallowing hard, he blinks once, twice, three times right there in the darkness. Nighttime's always been a hell of a time. He ran away at night and he watched his dog get run over at night and he killed his first guy at night. Nighttime's also the very last time he ever cried, back when he was ten or whatever, and he's not going to do it now.
Not a fucking chance.
Beth, I love you.
Beth, wake up.
Beth, I need you.
But it's... just an asteroid. It's small. It feels smaller than the damn Bebop half the time. Still, though, it's where Beth is and fuck if he's going anywhere that puts her in danger.
Sleep. He can't remember more than a time or two out there when he couldn't sleep, but he's had his share of sleepless times here. Mostly from nightmares but not this time. This has nothing to do with dreams, just with being awake.
His hand slides from her waist -- what used to pass for her waist -- to her belly. Junior. You listening in there? Tell me something: you going to love me like a father? I guess you're stuck with me either way but damn, kid, I love the hell out of your mom. She's beautiful and fearless and smart and I wish to hell it was my fault you're on your way to being here, but we can only play the cards we're dealt and that reminds me, don't ever fucking play cards with Faye. She cheats.
No, really. Listen to me, Junior. It's just a quirk of biology that you don't carry my genes but don't let that fool you: there's only one person in the whole damn universe who means more to me than you do and that's your mom, and once you're born I'm not going to make choices on who I love best. There's going to be three of us and it's all equal. It's not a contest. I love Beth and I'll love you. I already do. No one gets to take that away from the bounty hunter. No matter what, no one gets to take it away from me.
Fuck.
Swallowing hard, he blinks once, twice, three times right there in the darkness. Nighttime's always been a hell of a time. He ran away at night and he watched his dog get run over at night and he killed his first guy at night. Nighttime's also the very last time he ever cried, back when he was ten or whatever, and he's not going to do it now.
Not a fucking chance.
Beth, I love you.
Beth, wake up.
Beth, I need you.
